Life Love and God

I have had an interesting set of conversations this week which let me to some unusual musings.

I have two friends whom I love very much, Joan and Zairen.

I used to date Joan, and even tried to marry her, but it fell apart in one day of poor communication and bad decisions. The break was so deep that we didn't even talk for years. Through divine intervention, this has changed of late and we have been talking about our feelings for each other, where they were and where they are and what went wrong. We still love each other deeply.

I started comparing how I felt about her to how I felt about my other friends, and came up with Zairen. I have never really though about how I felt about Zairen, because I am not attracted to him in a sexual way, but simply as a very close friend. In consideration, I found that I loved him just as much as Joan, but in a slightly different way. I then started thinking about my love of them, to my love for my wife Michelle. I did this for a number of reasons, but mainly to clarify my feelings about those whom I care most deeply about, children aside.

I firmly believe that God created Michelle for me and I for her for there is no better match. If you believe in soul-mates, then you would understand that Michelle is mine and I am hers. I love Michelle like no other. Our love started quickly, developed fast, has grown and continues to grow every day of every year for the past 15 years. My love for her surpasses words, thoughts or mere emotions. I love her totally and completely. When compared to the love I have for Joan and Zairen, my love for Michelle surpasses them countless times. This does not diminish the love I have for Joan or Zairen, but merely puts it into perspective.

In thinking of the difference, I can see how God loves us. Mortal love is like the love I have for Joan and Zairen. We love, and love deeply, but God's love for us is such that our love pales in comparison. I am thankful that I have a God who loves us so much.... And for my lovely wife.

The one hope and dream that I have for Joan and Zairen is that they can be with someone who is to them as Michelle is to me.